Usaid@Adventist

Poor Usaid...I did not expect his complaints all this while turned out to be quite severe...
He was diagnosed to have a bad sinus problem during our short balk kampung trip last Saturday....
Luckily abah manage to persuade him to go to the hospital for further check up..
We immediately went to The hospital, arrived at about 10.30pm...
We requested for an ENT specialist as he as been complaining of shortness of breath and that he has been breathing through his mouth (poor Usaid)...
At this very hour while this entry is being done, my dearest hubs is still at the OT...I hope everything goes well for him....aminnn
I do pray that he will breath better than before....get well soon my dear Usaid!

Will be patiently waiting for my hubs...want him to regain his consciousness with me by his side....

Luv,
Sarah Z.

Time for updates!

Salam..
Its been more than a month since I last wrote..huhu...'What have I been up to?', you may ask..hehe..Well, I've been making myself 'BeZZZz' being a 'housewife'...Its fun though its the same old routine day in day out...my day starts at approximately 6.30am. So my routine is as follow :

6.00-6.30am : Subuh prayers + Preparing breakfast
7.30 am :  Off to KL to send hubs to work (Though nowadays we leave home at 8.00am....cuti skola ma,  
                 jln kurang jam ;p)

So by 8.30 or 9am I'm super free. So my day just pass by in split seconds doing nothing (Sometimes la..haha) Most of the time basuh baju, cook and etc...enough of the wifey2 stuffs...wouldn't wanna bore you with my daily schedules...huhu

Well within the past 1 month or so, I've been really busy with my wedding receptions in Penang and Johor...Will be updating on those soon [maybe tomorrow ;p]. Till then toodles

p/s : dear hubs, thanx for the ice-cweam night out!luv ya <3

Alhamdulillah

Salam..
After 4 tortoureous days of the pro 3 examination, it's finally over for me. Special thanx to my dearest hubs for all the sacrifices, doa, beautiful cards and gifts, luv u to bits and not to forget my supportive father who has been with me throughout my journey since I was little till I'm somebody's wifey...Tq abah for all the trouble and doa!!Tq mama and tq brothers!!!Only Allah can repay your kindness...Pro 3 ended much2 earlier for me coz my clinicals was on the 1st day. Only Allah knows how devestating it felt when I saw my name on the Monday slot for the clinicals. Abah guessed right. My clinicals happen to fall on a Monday, 25th April 2011...huhu..Well, came back with tears of fear actually...I had mixed feeling..I felt so unprepared, I tell you!!I had notes stacked on my table, bed and everywhere waiting for me to have a flip...Even if I had 100 more days to go, I would never ever be able to absorb every single details of medicine into my "limited" space of my "hard disc"..The 5 days of gap between my OSCE and clinicals was definitely not enough for me to cover everything...I even had my notes on my face while sleeping (Hoping some osmotic effect would take place while dozing off..haha)

25th April 2011
I guess there's always a hikmah behind being the Monday candidate. The cases were not too weird with exception to 1 or 2 cases..Alhamdulillah....Can't thank Allah enough for giving me some "light" during the examination...My Monday began with me being sent to the door by my fellow housemates who were all very supportive.It felt like going for a war and having all your family members waving goodbye and hoping that you'll be back home safe..Well as for me it was pretty much coming home with a title that me and all my coursemates have been working hard for which is the humble title of  "Dr..."...I gave my friends and roomie a hug and hoping that they'll pray for me while I'm at the battle field..Bismillah 19x and off I go...Headed to Marie's house on level 1...Joan Marie Palikat, the fine lady who accompanied me for the exams...We had  a "silent" conversation...I guess the both of us was nervous inside...As we arrived at the bridge connecting the faculty and the hospital, Marie said " This might be our last time passing this bridge and going through that door" and I replied "Yup, I hope so!"

Then we got into the lift. Marie's 1st destination, level 4 ; The Day Care Ward...Then I waved Marie goodbye and wished her good luck!...I was all alone then... " Tingg, level 8"...Yaiks, I've reached my destination! Then I tried to gain as much confidence and walked myself for my short case in Ward 8A...When I arrived, Lee Heng Fah was already patiently waiting for his turn to be called...At about 9.50 am, I was being called for my short case...I was introduced to my 3 examiners of which were our all time favourite neurologist, Prof Lim Poh Hin and 2 externals , Prof Wan Ariffin (Paeds UM) and Mr Andrew Das (KKM)...1st stop, a Paediatric case...To my surprise it was that little kiddo whom I've examined before..My task was to examine his CVS...To be honest I was kinda dissappointed with my performance but look at the bright side, I was still able to come to my diagnosis of PDA..Dr Johan was with me throughout my 3 short cases..After performing quite badly in the 1st case, Dr Johan led me to the next case and he was like "Go go go...!" (Dgn penuh semangatnya!..haha) Thank you Dr Johan!..Prof Lim took the lead...Yaiks, CNS!My all time enemy...huhu...Alhamdulillah,though I did not perform that well, I'm very thankful Prof Lim guided me through...I finally hit the diagnosis that he wanted to hear....Last but not least, Mr Andrew Das lead me to a surgical case..While we were on our way to the final case, Mr Andrew said to me "Why do you look so worried....relax2, you're doing well, don't worry". Deep inside I was like " I hope he really mean it...I hope that its not his way of making me calm  when it actual fact my performance was a disaster!"..huhu...The final task, "Examine the neck"..haha...what a coincidence, I had a practice a day before my exams on Dekda...thank you dekda for lending me your neck! ;p...Alhamdulillah, the 3rd case went smoothly...and before you know it, END of short case...So down with PAEDS, MEDICINE and SURGERY..Left with either PSYCHIATRY, OBS/GYNAE or perhaps the ouchy ORTHO for my long case!..haha

10.45am..
Off to the day care ward for the long case!..haha..at about 11.05am I was being called for clerking...Then Mr Paisal led me to my case and then I came to know that it was an ORTHO case...the posting that I hardly ever finish reading any chapter...I have allergies reading this boney subject...haha..Well, just go with the flow! I just had 1 hour to complete everything...Chief complaint? Pain on my right hip!Ahahh! It's the HIP...and I was like "HIP hip hoorey!"haha...Wondering why?hmm, thanx again to my fellow housemates, Sarahlailah & Nusrah for having a quick revision on hip examination..haha...Syukur Alhamdulillah!As I introduced myself to the fine lady whom I was asked to clerk, I tried to calm myself down and began to organize my thought..My 1st opening statement after asking her particulars was " Akak ada sakit darah tinggi, kencing manis n etc2 ?" and she replied " Akak takde sakit apa2 dik, alhamdulillah"...and I was like ALHAMDULILLAH big time!hehe...save the headache about co-morbids...huhu...as I went through the 1 hour, the lady was very supportive...Tq Allah for giving me such a good patient! :) Then, I waited patiently to be called in for presentation...Lecturers walk to and fro in front of me...I had about 10 extra minutes to reoorganise my presentation...my handwriting was horrible yet still readable...haha...No time for sentences, I just numbered my points in order...It was all about SURVIVAL MODE..huhu...Thank Allah my SURVIVAL mode was "functioning"..haha...After about 10 mins, Mr Paisal called me in, "Noor Sarah Zainol?" and I replied "Ye saya"..."Dah ready?Ok...All the best!" + a smile :D...As I entered, to my surprise, Prof Devnani!haha...my external examiners on that day were Dr.Salina (Psychiatrist@ Serdang) and Dr Ngau (KKM...my examiner during pro 2 as well..haha)..Prof Dev dominated the whole session...all in all, alhamdulillah Prof Dev was nice and guided me through..He gave me the confidence on that day, alhamdulillah!The 30++ minutes of discussion just passed superrr fast...and before you know it, PRO 3 was FINALLY OVER!hahaha...yeay! At that point of time, all I could do is TAWAKKAL...I've tried my ultimate best the rest is all up to Allah :)

26th - 28th April 2011
Finally back home, doing the wifey thingys..haha...
Then abah was admitted to the hosp for an operation :( [I guess this is one of the hikmahs of having my clinical exams on Monday]...Syukur I was given the chance to look after abah..alhamdulillah, his operation went well...

29th April 2011
Today's THE DAY...The day that will cure or perhaps precipitate anxiety!haha....We had a briefing about a community program at about 8.30am...We were initially informed that our results will be out after the Friday prayers...tiba2 we were told that the dean will announce the results at about 11 am...Apa lagi, super duper cuak ok!haha...really...Nasib baik I had my "anxiety remedy" which is Al-Quran...I recite my favourite surah many2 times to help me reduce my palpitations and anxiousness!...Alhamdulillah, its way2 better than propranolol (Altho I've never tried it...there's no indication for me to mkn propranolol pun..huhu..at least the remedy is without side effects ;)..."dub dub..."

11.05am
Prof Norlijah, our dearest dean walked in the meeting room...me and my roomie was like holding hands and hoping for GOOD NEWS!.."I'll be calling the names who have passed the exams..Those who are not being called, please stay back"...Then she started " Ruzaina...." half way through the deputy dean asked the dean to start calling our names with the "Dr" title in front...and so she continued "Dr Mohd Syafeeq Faiz....Dr.Azhar Faruqi......Dr.Sharifah Nursamihah" and I was like "Alamak, kenapa dah huruf  S..Padahal my name begins with N"...I did not lose hope...Then she continued "Dr Norlaila Abd Rahman.....Dr Nor Azillah Abd Aziz..."[and I was like "Ya Allah,please let my name be called upon after Azillah's]...and finally the most awaited "Dr. Noor Sarah Zainol" and I hugged my roomie and tears just drizzled down!I called abah, ma, hubs and umi..they were all happy for me! :D...My 5 years was just so full of ups and downs...I've gone through failures, viva for borderline, 2 weeks of remedial classes and finally Allah gave me the BESTEST gift in my entire life which is the title "DR"...Alhamdulillah!Thank you Allah...Thank you Allah for making my 5 years of journey end with the HAPPIEST ending! ;)


Well, its the end of one chapter in my life but a whole new beginning for another chapter. I'm officially carrying a title with a whole lot of responsibility. Nothing comes easy. Getting into medical school, going through medical school, getting the "DR" title and working as a "DR" is just as tough. I hope to become a good, safe and above all a "DR" with iman and patience! ~Amin...

Lastly, CONGRATULATIONS to all MD UPM 11th batch 2006/2011 and to my friends who did not make it this time, don't despair...Allah has a reason for everything...I believe that you'll be even better doctors...It's not the number of time you fail, its the number of time you stand up that matters most...Failure is not the end of everything, its actually the beginning of BIG success ;)

Toodles!! :)

3 Down 1 To Go

Salam...
It's been almost a month lebih since i last updated my bloggy...huhu...well am in the midst of examination week...done with theory...3 days was super fast...i really mean SUPERRRRrrr fast....2 hours,2 hours and 2 1/2 hours just flew.....theory was tough but I know my friends and I did our LEVEL BEST, the rest leave it to Allah...Tawakkal to Allah :)....Well, the next challenge is coming up pretty soon...the most fearful test as a medical student, THE CLINICALS...I know and I believe that Allah is always there for us, so LESS WORRY, KEEP MOVING FORWARD and NEVER LOOK BACK!...Chaiyok2 Sarah and my fellow friends! we've been thru all sorts of obstacles, insyaAllah we'll do  our best and i'll do my best..the rest i leave it to the ONE up there ;)

Ya Allah permudahkanlah urusanku dan teman2 seperjuanganku.Semoga kami menjadi doktor yg selamat dan beriman...~Aminn

Its March and Marching Through The Finals!

Salam...
It's been exactly 2 weeks of March....yaikss exam's getting super closer....well, like it or not, "THE DAY" will eventually make its way and hopefully Allah will make my journey as well as my fellow coursemates a smooth one...nothing's impossible aight?! ;)....

We do not want to be like this, do we ;p (Reminding myself to take things easy but not totally easy la of course...need some stress to keep me moving!huuu)




I have to hang on, pull myself together, focus (need lotsa2 focus!) and tawakkal to Allah...Being born a Muslim, we are one very lucky people aren't we...Allah is always there for those who are patient and strong (Again, reminding myself who's always being too squishy...come on Sarah!!chaiyok2)

Finally :

"Ya Allah, permudahkanlah urusan kami pelajar2 perubatan tahun 5 UPM untuk peperiksaan professional 3 yg bakal menjelma nanti. Semoga perjuangan kami berakhir dengan kesudahan yg baik" ~Aminn Ya Rabbal 'Alamin



All the best to ALL ...We CAN and InsyaAllah will strive our level best :)
Toodles!!

Tick tock!

Time is surely ticking realllllllllyyyy fast...if only I could pause the time and let me complete all the undone...too bad its to impossible to make it possible.....February is waving goodbye in just another 24 hours or so.....March is making its way through and soon my ultimate exam is next on the list :(...complaining won't do anything will it?!....i guess i just gotta get my 'nawaitu' right, put myself back on track and pray to Allah that my journey to become a doctor akan dipermudahkan, insyaAllah...same goes to all my fellow coursemates....we've been together through thick and thin for 5 years now....May Allah bless us all and insyaAllah go through this coming exam with ease ;)....being afraid & panicky is normal and is just sooooo me...i sooo have this anxiety issues when it comes to exams....need some anxiolytics STAT!...haha...anxiolytics is nothing compared to inner strength!After all, Allah kn ada :) 

Found this quote on the net and I can't agree less! Time flies but WE can definitely route our way through insyaAllah....I'm telling and reminding myself too to stop panicking and start routing my way through my studies in preparation for the finals!Chaiyok2 :)

Rahsia Khasiat Budu Terbongkar

Budu merupakan makanan traditional Kelantan dan Terengganu yang diperbuat daripada ikan bilis atau udang bari yang dijeruk sehingga hancur.

Budu atau sos bilis yang berasal dari negeri sebelah pantai timur Malaysia ini mendapat perhatian dan menjadi kajian para ahli pemakanan berkhasiat Jepun, Amerika Syarikat, Australia, New Zealand dan Jerman.

Penemuan baru-baru ini membuktikan kandungan budu memiliki gluthaione sebagai bahan antioksidan, mengeluarkan sisa toxic dan meningkatkan daya tahan tubuh (immune) yang dapat memerangi pelbagai penyakit merbahaya dan menghalang kanser.

Budu

Kenyataan ini bagaikan satu kejutan bagi golongan yang selama ini memperlekehkan kewujudan budu yang dianggap makan “kuno”.

Budu didapati berpotensi untuk melawan radikal bebas dan dipercayai mampu menghalang proses penuaan dan mencegah terjadinya penyakit degeneratif sepertiaterosklerosis, koroner jantung, penyakit kencing manis, kanser dan selainnya pada peringkat lebih awal.

Kajian mendalam juga mendapati budu turut mengandungi zat antibakteria penyebab [[diarrhoea|cirit (diarrhoea)], penurunan kolestrol darah, pencegah penyakit jantung danhipertensi.

Budu memiliki zat gizi yang lebih mudah dicerna, diserap dan dimanfaatkan oleh tubuh berbanding jenis protein yang lain. Khasiat budu yang diproses dari ikan bilis yang diperam terbukti mampu mengatasi masalah kanak-kanak yang menderita penyakit diarrhoea kronik akibat kurang zat pada tubuh.

Dengan pengambilan budu sebagai makanan sampingan, ia mampu menggalakkan pertumbuhan berat badan bagi golongan yang menderita penyakit diarrhoea kronik ini serta menyembuhkannya dalam waktu singkat.

Ia juga dapat mempertingkatkan IQ kepada sesiapa yang memakannya. kerana ia merangsangkan sel-sel otak dan akan memperkukuhkan ikatan di antara neuron-neuron serta menguatkan neuron-neuron yang lemah.

Pemakanan budu turut bertindak membantutkan pertumbuhan bakteria raffinosa danstokiosa, penyebab utama gejala flatulensi dan masalah kembung perut bagi kanak-kanak dan orang dewasa. 2 kelompok vitamin yang terdapat pada budu iaitu, vitamin larut air(vitamin B kompleks) dan vitamin larut lemak (vitamin A, D, E dan K).

Budu merupakan sumber vitamin B yang paling banyak menyumbang kepada pecahan lain seperti vitamin B₁ (thiamin), vitamin B₂ (riboflavin), asid pantotenat, asid niasin, vitamin B₆ dan vitamin B₁₂ (sianokobalamin).

Secara saintifik, budu merupakan penyumbang utama vitamin B₁₂ yang dihasilkan oleh bakteria klebsiella pneumoniae dan Citrobacter frundiin – yang mana vitamin B₁₂ ini tidak dimiliki dari mana-mana sumber makanan laut, ikan-ikan dan daging-daging lain. vitamin B₁₂ ini perlu untuk pembentukan sel darah merah, di mana kekurangan vitaman ini mengakibatkan terjadinya penyakit anemia perisiosa (pucat), sakit perut dan berat badan menurun.

Kadar vitamin B₁₂ dalam budu adalah di antara 1.5 sehingga 6.3 mikrogram per 100 gram bagi setiap satu hidangan atau 2 sudu besar. Jumlah ini jauh lebih cukup untuk keperluan badan manusia dalam sehari. Dengan adanya vitamin B₁₂ para pengamal diet (jaga badan) tidak perlu lagi merasa khuatir akan kekurangan vitamin B₁₂ di dalam badan.

Selain pembekal kepada protein yang tinggi, ia turut mengandungi mineral makro dan mikro dalam jumlah yang cukup. Jumlah mineral zat besi, kalsium dan magnesium adalah sebanyak 9, 39, 2, 87 dan 8.05 mg bagi setiap 100 gram budu. Budu juga mengandungi zat antioksidan dalam bentuk isoflavon.

Seperti halnya vitamin C, vitamin E dan karotenoid, isoflavon juga merupakan antioksidan yang sangat diperlukan oleh tubuh untuk menghentikan reaksi pembentukan radikal bebas.

Radikal bebas merupakan atom atau molekul yang mempunyai satu atau lebih elektron yang tidak berpasangan, sehingga menjadi sangat aktif hingga menyebabkan ketumbuhan tumor, kanser, penuaan dan kematian sel.

Radikal bebas didapati berpunca dari makan seharian yang dimakan dan juga dari reaksi yang terjadi di dalam tubuh. Adanya antioksidan di dalam budu akan mencegah pembentukan radikal bebas tersebut.

Kebiasaannya di dalam apa jua jenis ikan terdapat 3 jenis isoflavon unsur antioksidan iaitudaidzein, glisitein dan genistien. Pada budu, di samping 2 jenis unsur ini, terdapat juga antioksidan faktor 11 (6, 7, 4 trihidroksi isoflavon) yang mempunyai sifat antioksidan paling kuat dibandingkan isoflavon dalam ikan-ikan lain.

Penelitian yang dilakukan di Universiti North Carolina, Amerika Syarikat menemukan bahawa unsur genestein dan phytoestrogen yang terdapat pada budu terbukti dapat mencegah penyakit kanser, proses penuaan dan barah payu dara.

Penyakit jantung koroner (PJK) merupakan salah satu bentuk kelainan pembuluh darah koroner akibat penumpuan lemak di dalam dinding pembuluh darah iaitu satu keadaan yang disebut aterosklerosis. Ini mungkin disebabkan oleh faktor usia, pemakanan, jantina dan keturunan.

Manakala faktor dimodifikasi adalah peningkatan kadar lipida darah (hiperkolestrolemia), hipertensi, obesiti, stress dan kurang aktiviti lasak. Pemakanan budu yang mempunyai sifat hipokolesterolemik (menurunkan lemak darah) seperti kandungan protein, serta makanan, niasin, vitamin E, karotenoid dan kalsium.

Satu ujikaji rambang yang dijalankan, mendapati pengambilan budu sebanyak 150 gm sehari selama 2 minggu dapat menurunkan kadar kolestrol ke tahap luar dari jangkaan.

Selain dari sumber protein yang berkualiti tinggi, budu turut dikenali sebagai sumber serat (dietary fiber) yang baik. Kandungan serat di dalam budu mampu mencapai di antara 8 hingga 10% bagi setiap 100 gm. Ia menyumbangkan kepada 30% dari umlah serat yang dianjurkan oleh National Cancer Research.

Berbanding serat di dalam ikan-ikan atau sumber protein lain, serat pada budu lebih mudah untuk dicernakan. Dari apa yang dinyatakan ini jelas sekali bahawa khasiat serta kebaikan sepiring budu yang dimakan bersama hidangan nasi pagi, tengahari dan malam melampau jangkauan yang anda fikirkan. Budu seumpama cecair pelbagai vitamin yang memenuhi segala keperluan untuk tubuh badan.

Sumber: Wikipedia

Budu-mazing!!!Well its good news for a budu lover like myself!haha...I sure hope that the facts above are true...ooohh budu..it's been a while since I got the chance to squeeze some juicy lime, cut some super hot yet mouth watering cili api and not to forget the main ingredient BUDU, mix em' all in a decent sized bowl and spoon into a plate of hot rice...budulicious!yummmehhh...definitely gonna buduthon some time soon...that is after losing some kilos..haha..alrito...its back to my books...enough with budu-mazing ;)...toddlesss :D

Limping Gait.Not A Limping Mind

Salam...

While I was on my way to the shop, someone caught my attention (bukan usha2 tau...hubs ada kat sebelah....jgn salah faham ;p). I saw this Chinese chap walking his way to his car I suppose after a long day at work.That's pretty much a normal scenario we often see during weekdays,isn't that so?. What made him special was the way he walked.Yups,like the title says "Limping gait"...I could see the effort he makes in every single steps he takes. The moral of the story is, be thankful for what Allah has given us..Make full use of what we have..I guess it's true what people says, we tend to appreciate things that we lose rather than what we actually have..That young chap has taught me a good lesson today..If he could endure hardship with some physical disability, why can't a person like me and you who are Alhamdulillah physically well can't be just as good or even better? ;) Tq young man for instilling some positivity in me within a short glimpse!Toodles! ;D

Shabara’ala (صَبَرَ عَلَى)

Salam.
Yaiks,its been a while since I last updated. Have been extra busy with life lately. I make it a point to post something tonite! ;) Its gonna be about Shabara’ala (صَبَرَ عَلَى) . It's a word with a great meaning and great consequences. That's why there's such thing as "Sabar itu separuh daripada Iman" which I believe is true but often overlook at its importance. I'm writing here about this one special word to actually remind myself about how important it is. One word explains it all. I chose this 'word of the day' pretty much because it has something to do with what I'm going through. Friends come and go. Everyone has their own attitude. Some opportunists, some cares about you and drags you along when you feel like big loser while some don't. We were'nt all born the same. How do you or would you feel if a friend you thought you could rely on just dump you whenever he/she likes?It's PAINFUL!  Your defense mechanism?My personal choice is to flood my eyes with tears and just hope it'll carry along the pain of feeling useless and worthless. Then, there comes my hubs all the way from home to console and comfort me (Thanks a bunch dear!). He then says to me these few meaningful lines " Sesungguhnya kesudahan yang baik itu adalah untuk orang-orang yang bersabar"....There you go "bersabar"....and to compliment the word "bersabar" the words of a friend of mine comes in "Kita kan ada Allah" ;) That's why there's a court to fight for justice which often does injustice rather than justice. And why is that so? Humans are just unfair. That why Allah is Great, Fair and Non judgemental. This last few months before my finals, I just hope and pray that Allah will make a stronger and more enduring muslimah to face whatever obstacles and attitude of another Allah's creation.


The word "sabar" is everywhere in the Quran. Since exam is approaching, the adrenaline level is markedly increasing, the time is ticking, the books are stacking, the knowledge is overloading, the level of patience is being extra2 tested I've attached a simple yet a suitable surah to remind myself about time, togetherness and PATIENCE!

Demi masa. Sesungguhnya manusia itu benar-benar berada dalam kerugian. Kecuali orang-orang yang beriman dan mengerjakan amal soleh dan nasihat menasihati supaya menetapi kesabaran.


Be strong (telling myself too...I've been emotionally tested this few months with all sorts of attitude.) It's ok Sarah. Be PATIENT!Allah is here for me :)

Toodles!

A lesson learnt

Salam everyone.
Its been a while since I last blogged.huhu.Currently doing my Psychiatry posting.hmm.I learnt quite a lot within the past 1 week.It's not something that you can get from the books.It's a true life story told by someone who went through it.For this current posting,it's not the typical psychiatry posting like what I went through in Year 4,it's LIASON PSYCHIATRY which means other disicplines from all other departments referring cases to psychiatrist to deal with the psychological issues.

We had a 2 days visit to Hospital Sg.Buloh.It was a nice place I tell you.One word for it 'BIG'.hehe.Well,that's not the main thing.We were there for a reason.Everyone was assigned to 2 different wards.On my 1st day there,I was assigned to the ward while on my 2nd day there,I was assigned to Pusat Kawalan Kusta Negara, one of the earliest infectious diseases center in the region, bravo!.I was exposed to 2 different patients with 2 different experience but with 1 same illness,HIV.Due respect to both the patients whom I clerked,am very thankful to the both of them who gave me a whole new perspective about HIV,one of the most stigmatized illnesses around the world.I guess some of you make think "So what's the big deal,its a fact that everyone knows!".In my point of view,it is a big deal and it is totally different when you're the one who personally chats with them.I somehow had a short dive (2 hours was not enough to fully understand what they went through) into the life of a HIV patient.The Q's is,who are the one who stigmatize?It's US,the society and to be more precise the medical professionals. In fact,I've personally seen or I should say WITNESSED the whole discrimination thingy occurring in the ward. I'm not trying to criticize the medical professionals as I myself will be part of it very soon,insyaAllah.I'm just here to share a story of how we look at people differently and often judge people for something that may or may not be their fault.Not all HIV patients got themselves involved in immoral activities and finally ended up with HIV.Some were just normal individuals who had normal lives but just got unfortunate.It's just sad falling in either one of the categories of patients which I've mentioned above.I'll be sharing with you 2 different stories from 2 different patients but with the same illness.

True Story No.1 :

"I take full responsibility for what I've done and undertsand that what I'm going through IS the price I've to pay"

Well that was the exact word of the patient which has been translated to English.Some may say "Padan muka","Serves you right","Why were you silly enough to get yourself involved in drugs,homosexuality,prostitution and etc.??" My answer on their behalf is "They were not as fortunate as others that they chose the wrong path and ended up unfortunate".I'm not agreeing to what he did.It was still very wrong of him.Looking back at this patient who lives in a felda settlement,which sounds perfectly ok to most of us but what made it NOT OK was that the felda he lives in was full of HIV patients,drug addicts and practically everything which involves the life ruining substance (if being misused of course!) "DRUGS a.k.a DADAH". With all that in mind, I don't totally put the blame on him. He was 15 when it all started. The influence was way to strong for a young teenager like him to handle. So he did not have the strong will and made the wrong move.But,who are we to judge? Only the One on the top, Allah can judge us for what we've done. Going in and out of prison was just as good as passing a drive-thru for a quick meal to fill the tummy. Prison was equivalent to 2 weeks of free food, free scolding and etc. But did it made him a changed man?Definitely a NO.He was back to his usual routine which was practically eat,sleep perhaps dream about drugs. Despite of all that, he had a good family support. He was telling me that whenever he was badly craving for drugs, his mother would come near him and would gently stroke his hair and touch him in a motherly sort of way. He is lucky in that sense. Thank Allah for giving him such caring parents and family who unconditionally loved him.

True Story No.2

"I was from a religious family.I've never gotten myself involved in drugs or things against my religion until I met this girl when I was sent to Thailand by the police. I accept the fate from Allah. It was my mistake which I will regret for the rest of my life".

This guy here is a refugee from Myanmar. He was a very honest looking guy. He was in his early 40's but looked slightly older than his age. I could roughly gage that he went through a hard life. He traveled all the way from his country to Malaysia with a pure intention to earn a living away from his own country who discriminates him. Unfortunately, he was caught and sent to Thailand. He did not give up. He did odd jobs to support himself. Life doesn't always go as planned. One day he met an attractive Thai lady at the market. She was a fruit seller. I guess she manage to catch his attention that they fell for each other. After 2-3 months, they crossed the line. And yes he regretted it A LOT!That's why we Muslims believe never go out in two's because its not only the "two" of you, there's a third party with you.hah!sounds mysterious aight?!Well,it's true.What caught my attention was actually how the healthcare system was like in Thailand. He felt unwell after the "incident" with his new girlfriend. He had no money to go to the clinic so he waited after 3 days. The doctor advised him to get a blood test done. His reply was "I don't have the money". The doctor then replied "If you don't have the money, we can't proceed with the test. You could possibly have HIV. Well, it doesn't matter. It's better for you to not know. If you're tested positive, it might ruin your life but if you're tested positive then it's just your luck". Being frank is good at times but the way I see it in his case,it was rough for someone foreign to the country to handle. Well, he went back without knowing his HIV status. He then went back to Malaysia to start a new life. A few years later, he got married to a widow of 2 kids of which was an arranged marriage. She was not pretty physically but she had a pure and beautiful heart. She was and still is a good wife and mother. He lived happily with his wife and 2 step kids.He was well all along until 3 months ago when he felt unwell. Things just happened fast. He went to the clinic, complained of prolong fever and vomiting. The doctor explained that it was pretty unusual to have gastric like symptoms along with fever. So he was subjected for a HIV rapid test. It was just not his day. It was +ve.At least the doctor was kind enough not to make such "rough" statement like the one before.Above all, thank Allah though. He did not do silly things like committing suicide and what not. He accepts the news as a form of punishment. He did not immediately told his wife. Until he was required for referral to Hosp Sg Buloh. The doctor told him to get his wife tested. What miracle it was, Subhannallah, she was tested -ve. -ve even after they've been together for 4 years. He said that "I slept with a girl I just knew for 1 night and got infected with HIV. I've been sleeping with my legally wedded wife for 4 years and she's free from HIV.Allah is Fair and Just".


Those are the 2 different individuals whom I met. Kind enough to share their story. I don't mean to brag about HIV and what not.It's just a little reminder to everyone and to myself that don't discriminate no matter how wrong the person is. Everything happened for a reason. I hope that you've learnt a little something from the story above which I definitely did. InsyaAllah. I hope that the society won't look at these people differently. Treat them just the way you want people to treat you.

Tawakal kepada Allah

Assalamualaikum...
Well the clinical side of the end of posting examination is over...alhamdulillah...well,im glad its over but I wish I could do better...Well,I'm not going to give up...making mistakes is VITAL as long as we're HUMAN BEINGS...no one (I can bet you my last ringgit!) has lived in this world without making any mistakes....Well I definitely learnt my weaknesses from today's short case exam...I guess more practice with short cases would make a difference...I'm not going to blame anyone other than myself...I learnt from my 'akak usrah' (not trying to claim myself as a pious person or anything,but am very interested to improve my knowledge pertaining Islam) that you should always feel good about yourself and not to always blame yourself for what had happened cause there was a study done in Japan stating that saying negative things about yourself would cause some molecular changes in our body of which contains about 75% of water. Intereseting fact!So let's all (telling myself too) be POSITIVE!I've done my level best and the rest 'tawakkaltu a'lallah'...I came back quite unhappy until my friend came by and consoled me with her very famous quote 'Kita kan ada Allah' which almost always and almost immediately puts a smile on my face...Yup, I have Allah..I have my hubs, family and friends who have always been here for me at times of difficulties...will be facing bigger challenges, I just simply can't give in easily!yeahhh!chaiyok2!!!will berjuang till the end!!! ;)

Exam Week

Assalamualaikum...
As the title goes,its gonna be a brainy week...huhu...need all the neurones to connect and hopefully some stored knowledge can be vomited out during the exam...aiyak!...well one done...2 more to go...had my long case today... out of all the i should say "common" types of diseases, i was given a patient who came in with a unilateral leg swelling...well i came to a provisional diagnosis of "Cellulitis secondary to trauma with a poorly controlled DM and chronic alcoholism"...grrr...well got to prepare myself for my short cases on Wednesday and my written exam on Friday...boy i can't wait to meet my hubs after a long and hectic week!missing you already hubs!:(...till my next post...toodlesss! ;)

mymp - no ordinary love

For my everdearest... ;)

Happy New Year 2011 + Exam Mode

Assalamualaikum...

I won't be blogging about my solemnization ceremony for this post. Just dropped by to wish everyone a Happy New Year 2011 ...Tahun baru Islam passed a few weeks ago...as usual, new year's resolution you may ask?...well for me, my new year's resolution started during last maal hijrah which was a few days before my solemnization...i prefer to keep things to myself when it comes to resolutions...to me its something very personal...hmm..more of a personal achievement...one thing for sure is, I'll be sitting + facing my end of posting examinations next week (wish me luck! ;D)...well the ULTIMATE PRO 3 examination is just a few months away...I can just see the PRO 3 EXAMS waving at me...huhu...well,study smart Sarah...syukur Alhamdulillah I now have extra support from my hubs ;)...well, I think I'll have to end here for this post...till the next post...taaaa ;)